Receiving Feedback

by Bud Lambert

Failing to properly receive feedback can be very tragic. Stephen's encounter with the Sanhedrin in Acts 6:8-7:60 is a good example of this. The Sanhedrin did not properly receive Stephen's strong, confrontive form of constructive feedback. The tragic result was Stephen being stoned to death and the Sanhedrin continuing their murderous, disobedient behavior.
You and I need to properly receive feedback. Feedback, the process of telling a person something you have observed about them, positive or negative, and of which they probably are not aware, is a very common mode of communication. As long as we communicate with others and others communicate with us, from time to time, we are going to be given feedback. Some feedback we are given will be constructive (meant to help us), but like it or not, some of it will be destructive (meant to put us down). In either case, it is very important we receive it in a Christian way -- a way that will benefit us, the sender of the feedback, our relationship with the sender and the cause of Christ.

Here are some general guidelines that can help us receive feedback in a Christian way.
1. Patiently listen and try not to be defensive.
2. Summarize to the sender your understanding of the feedback. It may be you did not correctly understand the feedback. Summarizing helps to make sure there are no misunderstandings.
3. Let the sender know your thoughts and feelings about the feedback.
4. Check with other people concerning what was said to see if they feel the same way. No one person has all knowledge. Don't react or form conclusions about yourself based on the ideas of one person or one group of people.
5. If you judge the feedback as being correct, use it constructively toward your personal growth. If you judge it as incorrect, disregard it and forget it.