The First Step

by James Whiteaker

I have been privileged to see more love between brethren since becoming an elder. It makes my heart glad to see the sharing of joy, sorrows, and shortcomings between our family and the open, caring hearts that show themselves every day. Mt Juliet is truly a loving congregation. Therefore, I would like to relieve you of a burden of fear that I have also seen within the church, the fear of not knowing what to do. The scriptures are clear in how to handle this problem. Matthew 18:15 "And if your brother sins, go and reprove him in private; if he listens to you, you have won your brother" NKJV. This is directed to the Christian family, "thy brother". There is no liberty given in the scriptures to omit this step. Sometimes our brethren do or say something that injures us personally or the church in general. Our charge is to go personally to that member, not out in public, but privately; not open for the world to see. Jesus was injured in public and the world scoffed. It should not be in the church. Certainly we do not discuss it with others before going to the brother. The purpose is to give the brother an opportunity to explain himself and possibly show there is no offence or give the brother an opportunity to repent of his trespass against you. He may be more afraid than you. Prior to this instruction, Jesus had just told the apostles that they should be as this little child. If you both have good hearts, then the matter is settled and your bonds and those to the church are strengthened. Fear of what may happen should not hinder you. The scriptures have additional steps to take if the one-on-one meeting is not successful. This first step is the hardest but it will be the most fruitful. Please do not let your fear cause a brother to fall in his sin and do not fear acknowledging to your brother that you are sorry for your offence. But remember the first step is yours. It is not the elders. It is not the preachers. It is yours.

• Love Your Neighbor -Nov 20, 2005
• Settling Differences -Feb 08, 2004
• What Do I Do When Something with the Church Makes Me Mad? -Oct 21, 2001
• Holidays and Family: Do you anticipate holiday cheer or holiday tears? -Dec 17, 2000
• Shoveling Burning Coal -Aug 17, 1997